Oh Come On Now!

You know, there were a few things I thought everyone knew and agreed with. But I was wrong. I have been out of town on a business trip and encountered for two days straight…

Open toed shoes and pantyhose.

I mean really. Pantyhose are bad enough, but with open toed shoes. I thought we all knew better. But apparently in some parts of the state, the rules of modern clothing don’t apply.

I can understand the need for pantyhose from time to time. They cover any flaws or imperfections, they cover up your legs they may not have been shaved all that recently, and sometimes they even have paneling that make your clothes fit better and your posture straighter. The world loved Middleton Sisters are fans of pantyhose. I get it, I get it. Totally fine. But with open toed shoes!!?!? Not only do your toes look weirdly bound together, but the seam is obvious. And the point of pantyhose are to cover your imperfections in an invisible way. Thus showing the seam defeats the entire purpose!

I’ve said enough. I don’t need to insult your fashion intelligence anymore. You know that pantyhose and open toed shows are a terrible idea. It's clearly my not so secret dream that the last of the "seamshowers" will read this wee little entry and quit friggin' wearing this awful combo!

Exciting!

I just got some very exciting news my friends! Since many of my entries involve relationships and the opposite sex, I have invited "the average guy" to weigh in on a few subjects.

Keep your eyes peeled in the coming days for entries from my new guest blogger! And feel free to add your own comments too!

xx
N

Clothing Issues

I’ve begun the process of writing this blog entry 10 different times about how I have nothing to wear, except I have too much stuff.  Then I continue on to say that I’ve gone up a size, so fit is an issue. But I’m an avid closet cleaner & I shop a lot. So my complaints are totally invalid. Then. Last night. It hit me. I need to have a better clothing ratio. Yes, clothing ratio. 

When you shop, often you find yourself thinking, what do I own that will go with this? And generally, if you have a multitude of options, it’s a winner. But as you know, you also buy things that are so perfect, you’ll find/buy stuff later that work with what you just got.

Apparently, I have gotten into this problem with pants. I keep buying them, because they are “a great deal”, “a basic”, or “the perfect plaid/check/pinstripe” and they seem ridiculous to not buy. But here are my issues; A) I use all the money I’ve allotted myself for that shopping trip on pants and only pants; B) I hate wearing pants! I much prefer dresses and skirts. 

So here is little ratio I’ve come up with, that I’m going to try for the next few months and see if this doesn’t fix my “I have nothing to wear”s.

For every bottom (skirt, pants, shorts, etc.) you must have x amount of tops. But what is X? Probably different for every person. Generally it seems 3 to 5 tops (including a layering piece or jacket) will do the trick. But then there are basic pieces like jeans or your favorite pencil skirt that seem to go with everything. Which is truthfully the goal of a good wardrobe. Most everything should feel like it goes with everything else.

Have you ever seen a month long clothing diagram? Certain fashion magazines show them periodically. They take say, 15 pieces (Two pairs of pants, two skirts, a dress, a blazer, a cardi, 3 or 4 tops, and accessories) and then they mix and match them into a month of outfits. I find them absolutely fascinating – they always show an interesting (if not sometimes desperate) mix of outfit choices. Matching different colors, textures, and accessories, while, let’s face it, belting everything!

Truth: I keep them all together in a box in my spare room, so that when I’m packing for a trip or planning an outfit for an important event and I have clothing block (like writers block), I always have something easy to turn to. 

All in all, tops are what I'm after, so that is what I'll find. Unless I find that perfect pair of pants, on sale... Just kidding!

Have you tried...

Sorry about the lack of writing lately, yours truly has been hit by the worst kind of ailment imaginable – I’ve lost my voice! I literally can’t speak. Or couldn’t on Sunday and Monday. Today thankfully I’ve been able to squeak out some snark. My lost voice stemmed from a tiny sore throat last week and then completely over doing it ALL day on Saturday – because I wasn’t sick any more. Lies. All lie. I was sick, my sick was lingering below my glittery exterior. Which brings us to this week’s “Have you tried…” blog entry!

Have you tried Traditional Medicinal’s Throat Coat? I was introduced to this wonder tea last fall when I was juuuust starting to get sick. You steep it in hot water like regular tea and then drink. It’s a fairly easy process. The magic is what happens when you drink it. It soothes your throat with every drop – but what’s more, it tastes great! It isn’t nasty, bitter, or mediciny (you know what taste I’m talking about).  It has layers of flavors starting with a spicy cinnamon-like flavor and then ends on a peculiar sweet note. It almost chills your mouth.

For anyone who gets a sore throat or seems to lose their voice fairly easily (ah-hem), this is an AMAZING product. It actually comes in two flavors; the delicious original in white and red packaging – which I have found most at most grocery stores, organic markets, and big box stores; and the elusive Lemon Echinacea. I have only found the Lemon Echinacea at one store and I bought the last box – but it’s worth it if you find it. It gives a tangy zip, but is also incredibly refreshing.

Next time you feel any sort of throat issue coming on, or just want some delicious tea to drink… it’s worth a try!

New Rule Learned

Last night, I was out with a friend. She and I had been to a benefit that was casino themed, so we agreed on wearing our most obnoxious sequined dresses. Mine was a one sleeved black mini with gold and bronze sequins on one sleeve in almost a flame design. It's so trashy and I love it. And it is appropriate for casinos. So, my girl friend that I was with wore a black strapless dress where the front was completely covered in silver sequins. It was AMAZING... and slightly reminiscent of a disco ball. 

We loved our dresses and wore crazy shoes. It was great. Now usually when wearing "louder" clothes, guys tend to stay away. They seem to fall into the category of "Girl Clothes" (rather than boy clothes) ... more on that subject tomorrow or the next day. 

Well, last night was completely different, not for me but for my friend. Every place we went, everywhere we walked, anyone we walked by, every single person (and I'm not exaggerating) stopped her and told her how amazing she looked. Truthfully, I have to agree, she looked fantastic. But it was ridiculous last night - it was like she had one of those bug lights on and every mosquito in the entire town came to visit. 


By the end of the night she had been chatted up, had her arm touched, given lots of complements (rightly so!) and... sniffed. Yep. She was sniffed. Not once, but twice. TWICE! At that moment we agreed that it was time to go home. But we learned a new rule:


Sequined disco ball dresses = boy magnets. 


Next ladies' night you go to... juuuuust a little something to keep in mind.

How To: Put on Fake Eyelashes

Do you ever have the desire to add a little umpf to your look for a special event or a night out? My favorite solution is to add fake eye lashes! And they are SO early. I promise! What you need, individual eye lashes (don’t get the full eye), eye lash glue, tweezers, and liquid liner (preferably black).  You can get these things at any drug store, walmart, or target. And if you’re lucky, you can get a starter pack that has all three things.  Once you’ve got your stuff, here’s how you do it. 

Step One: Prep – Open your packaging, unclamp your tweezers, and unscrew your glue. Curl your eye lashes and coat them with a layer or two of mascara.

Step Two: Take your non dominant hand and flex it away from you. You’ll notice between your thumb and pointer finger on the back of your hand, there is a little indention (about a half inch below the web on that hand). Take your eye lash glue and put a little in there. About the size of half a dime. 

Step Three: Take your tweezers with your dominant hand and pick up an eyelash. Depending on the length of lashes your have/purchased start with the largest ones on the outside of your eye and let them get smaller in the inside of your lashes.  Grasp in the middle of the lash and dip the end (where everything is attached) into the glue on your hand. 

Step Flour: Place the eye lash on top of yours actual eye lashes (long on the outside, medium in the middle, short on the inside). Try to get it as close to the root as possible, but don’t sweat it if they aren’t perfect. You’ll fix it in a minute.

Step Five: Repeat steps 3 & 4 until you feel you have enough lashes on. Truth: three lash clumps on each eye makes a huge difference, but if you want more (I always do), go for it!

Step Six: Take your liquid liner and slowly make a thin line (inside to out). This line will blend any eyelashes that didn’t get places close enough to the root. 

Step Seven: One more coat of mascara on top of the fake lashes, to give a more blended look (as if your new lashes could almost be yours)

Done! 

It’s THAT easy. And the more you do it, the easier it is. And then you’ll find yourself putting them on for any occasion you can think of.

How To: Make Anything Work Appropriate. Ish.

You know when you have those days, where you have absolutely nothing to wear and it takes you 15 minutes to get dressed… and you’re already running late. Funny, me too. 

Well, here is my little game I started playing on days that I didn’t feel like I had anything to wear or frankly just didn’t want to go to work. (Because somehow wearing something I’m not supposed to wear to work made me feel like I getting away with something and generally made me a little happier to go to work.) Besides the obvious miniskirts, leggings, and denim – most things can be made work appropriate with the right layering, jewelry, or even shoes.

Skirts that are JUST too short

- Tights my friends. Wear tights. Patterned, solid, opaque – all give the appearance of covered legs, so a skirt that is too short isn’t nearly as obvious.

- Also, wear flats – since heels make your legs look longer, flats do the opposite, so it takes less attention from your legs (or the two inches showing above your knee).

Inappropriate tops

- Tank tops- It’s all about layering. Cardigans, blazers, or even button down shirts under the tank.

- Sheer or lace tops – wear something under it – obviously

- Tunics – wear it tucked in a skirt with a few necklaces.

- Sequined  T-Shirt – Solid Dress Pants or with a skirt. The key here is to minimize jewelry. You’re already wearing something a little wild and loud, so need to further advertise it.

- Basic T-Shirt – My absolute favorite! I wear these with high waisted skirts and tons of bracelets. Dress up something a little casual. 

Dresses

- Cardigans are pretty obvious. They cover a multitude of sins or just sleeveless, tubes, halters.

- Another favorite way to cover my arms is with a crisp white shirt (as long as I don’t feel too young).

- Belt anything that doesn’t look dressy or professional enough.

- For short dresses (see skirts)

Casual Sweaters

- Wear with a dress or skirt, then belt it. 

Crazy Shoes

- A more modest outfit always works well.

Too short pants, capris or cropped pants

- As long as they’re not denim, dress them up a little.

- Wear your best and favorite shoes, so that the shorter pants look deliberate. The shorter pants will make someone’s eye go to your shoes – so make their look worth it.

- Wear heels! As I mentioned earlier, a higher heel will make your leg look longer. Since short pants/capris/crops/etc cut a line in your leg, thus making you look shorter, heels will combat this issue. 

All in all, it’s really easy to make things work appropriate – and these tips will add a ton of stuff to your work wardrobe. The basic idea to keep in mind: if it’s casual, dress it up. If it’s over the top, add some formality. If it’s revealing, cover up.  

A Letter to the Editor/Me

Not sure if you're accepting letters to the editor, but I have a predicament:

I was reading your advise on everything a girl needs in her wardrobe and found I'm off to a good start - have quite a few great pieces.

I also loved your point about having the leopard print cardigan.

I've also noticed animal print is very in this fall, with Ann Taylor and White House Black Market carrying quite a few pieces. However, I'm a novice to pulling off animal print and I am wondering how to do it classy. I have my eye on a cute pair of flats, pumps, clutch, and cardigan. Is one piece at a time the max? Or could you do flats and the clutch? Or flats and the cardigan? If I decide to get any, I want to keep it classy.

Thanks in advance,

Your loyal reader!

Dear Loyal Reader:

Merci! I'm also taking letters to the Editor/Me. So feel free to ask any questions! I'm always full of answers!

If you are new to leopard (or any animal print for that matter) start with accessories. I own all of the items you mentioned (flats, pumps, clutch, & cardi) and I wear them ALL the time.

Here's a quick run down of how I wear my leopard accessories.

- I wear the flats almost any time I would consider black flats or wear a solid color. I also love to wear them with a t-shirt stolen from my boyfriend and a pair of jeans, throw on a crazy necklace and go run errands. Comfy, yet interesting & eclectic. 

- For the heels, I love wearing them with a pencil skirt or peaking out of super wide leg pants. I really give my outfit a 50's vibe with leopard pumps.

- With a leopard clutch, I would wear it any time you wear a solid dress. Which - let's face it, is practically every weekend. Leopard obviously goes great with metallic jewelry. I'm seeing a jewel toned shift dress, layers of gold (or silver) necklaces, and a leopard clutch. But! I'm also seeing a white dress, a chunky turquoise necklace, and a leopard clutch - for the middle of summer.
- As for the cardigan, leopard. I have to get a new one, because I've totally outworn mine! Love it with EVERYTHING! I love leopard in the summer with little dresses, but I love it in the winter with tweed.

Here's my eye with leopard, I squint my eyes and and whatever color pops, is the main color that is scene, so I either match to that or choose something that "goes". I tend to wear just one piece at a time, but then I also wear a TON of accessories. If you were to do double leopard, I would say maybe a leopard belt and a shoe. But you MUST get the leopard from the same line. Because you don't want to look like the crazy cat lady that loooooves leopard so much she wears every leopard thing she can find.

Happy matching!
xoxo
N

Easy Cooking

I love to eat. There is no argument about that from any side. And I really enjoy cooking. But sometimes after work (and the gym, and errands, and…) I have no desire to make dinner. I realize pizza, fast food, and cereal aren’t exactly acceptable options every night. 

But really, I find there are two issues – and I think most dinner preparers can agree.

1) It takes SOOOO long!

2) I don’t know what to make.

You want to snap your fingers and a delicious, gourmet meal full of vitamins and nutrients. Blah blah blah. Yeah, I want to do that, but I have a job. And have a house to run. And I don’t even have kids yet. Yikes! How do working parents do it? I suppose asking demanding to know what someone wants for dinner works most of the time, but I am not a short order cook, nor do I strive to be. Thus the introduction of the time honored (and my personal favorite) pulling an Eric Cartman, “Screw you guys, I’m…” making whatever the heck I want! 

I’m always keeping an eye out for easy recipes that aren’t terrible, are pretty easy, and aren’t too bad for me (because let’s be honest, if it’s really easy to make, it’s probably not THAT good for you). And here is what I’m working with:

I’m starting to obsessively read cookbooks for recipes that sound good. And if I really like them and decide I’m feeling cheap, a quick snap with my phone’s camera and I’ve got it forever. Or for a while… My current favorite cookbook is “5 in 10”. Five ingredients (or less) in 10 minutes (or less). Yay! Great desserts, easy sauces, and interesting flavor combos. What I really like is that it goes over classic cooking techniques and ways to make them still taste great but work faster. For example: adding white wine to a pan after cooking chicken or fish and a little bit of flour to thicken up your now made sauce. I didn’t go to culinary school – I would never know to do that. But it’s tasty!

Another easy solution I’ve found is adding different spices and flavors to the same dish I made the week before. I’ll cook it the same way, but I’ll add rosemary instead of oregano. Or heck, I'll add both!

I’m not going to lie, frozen bagged dinners (which are BOGO at Publix all the time) that include veggies, chicken or shrimp, pasta, and a sauce are great. I usually add fresh sliced up veggies to these to make a really easy on pan stir fry. 

I’m also a huge fan of the Sandra Lee method & getting something that is half made at the store already – Like chicken finger salads. (Though I love to make my own chicken fingers with panko breading – if you haven’t tried it, it will change your life) I’m so happy to pop into the store, grab their chicken fingers, then go to the produce section and make myself a delicious salad. And voila, I’m a culinary genius. (It’s not really cooking, but it’s fast and easy)

Other things to make cooking easier – I keep a running list of easy to make dinners & side dishes (aiming for mostly veggies). That way if I am stumped, I can always look at easy things I’ve made before that have passed with flying colors. 

What are your favorite easy recipes?

Quick Thought

I dislike the spelling “Drive-Thru” 

Severely dislike it. It’s spelled through. And should be spelled so every time. If you spell it “Thru” I can only assume your sign maker was lazy or not good at their job. And then I will judge you, because you have yet to correct your sign’s misspelling.