Oh The Places You Will Work

If you're anything like me, and I suspect you are - you have a job. At this sometimes delightful place where you work, you probably work with other people, right? For those of you who are stay at home parents or work from home luckies, this doesn't really apply to you, but I suggest reading on. You never know when you'll find something entertaining or helpful (and I'm aiming for both!)

I work for an awesome company, in an absolutely beautiful office. With that being said, it is a small office of just a handful of people. We see each other for hours on end with, at times, minimal outside interaction.  Since we here at NattilyNatalie discuss fashion, fare, and FORM - let's go over a few handy tips to make your work life a little less frustrating... and maybe a little more fun!

Work Selfies Happen

Starting You Day

- Have you noticed some people park in the same spot everyday? Don't take their spot. Some people are very particular. There is always plenty of parking (or even company or city assigned spots). Keep those in mind.

- Some people are morning people. Some people are not. Some people need a lot of coffee to function. Those of us who are morning people (Oh, oh! Meeee!) sometimes need to make a little effort to keep our water cooler chatter to a minimum, until your usual work companion is ready for pleasantries. 

- Did you fight traffic on your way in? Me too. Everyday. Glad to hear a little about it, but there is little need to discuss bad traffic every morning adnasum. 

- Having a bad morning? Fight with your significant other? Hungover? Leave it at the door. If you can't,  give a quick "hey guys, I'm going to have a bit of a quiet morning." Your coworkers will understand.

- Altenatively, if you have a normally chatty coworker who is acting a little odd, a quick "Everything okay?" Is more than okay. But please make sure to give them space if they need it. They may not want to share details with you. 
- If you're grabbing coffee, donuts, danishes, whatever for breakfast of a snack - don't be a jerk. Ask if anyone else wants something.

Day-to-day

- Hey guess what? You are at work to work... So I actually recommend doing that for the majority of the time your are in your office, if not the whole time. Coworker interaction is inevitable. Feel free to be friendly or brief - it's about your comfort level. You definitely want to be pleasant, but don't be afraid to end a conversation.

- It's really normal and natural to have a little crush on a client or coworker. DO NOT ACT ON IT. Seriously. It's the best way to ruin your career. 

- If someone (be it coworker or client) is making you uncomfortable, say something to them. Or your manager. Or their manager. Key point: tell someone.

- Are you the one in control of the music at your office? Lucky you. May I advise, play it softly. No one wants to have to yell over your uns-ing house music, nor do the want to have to try to think around it. Keep it PG, keep it quietish, and please don't play the same 5 songs over and over again. 

- If you are sneakily watching videos, don't try to make everyone else watch them. Especially if they are inappropriate. Even if you don't find them inappropriate. 

- Don't whistle or sing along to the music. Zero people want to hear it. Zero.

- Try to keep your bodily activities (post lunch brushing and flossing, nose blowing, etc.) in the restroom. Seriously. Kinda gross. Yes, we all do it. But eugh. 

- Can I second that recommendation of brushing and/or flossing post snack/lunch/whatever?  Especially if you had a fragrant curry or a giant bowl of hummus (I'm certainly guilty of eating both). Regardless of the space you are working in, you probably have another human who has to come near your work space, and people have sensitive noses. You get my gist. 

- Don't mess with the air conditioning. If you are cold and everyone is cold, fix it. But if someone is complaining about being hot and you are freezing, go ahead and bring a sweater or jacket into the office. I recommend a light wool blend.  ... I live in Florida. The coldest it gets here is in August - because everyone's A/C is set to 64 degrees. 

- Keep your eyes on your own work. Unless someone invites you to look or asks you how to do something, consider it Noneya. (As my lovely friend M says, it's Noneya Business).
- If you're going to be on your phone, try to be subtle. No one wants to see their employee blatantly off task. Use the restroom, like everyone else.

End of The Day

- We're all in a rush to get home. It doesn't hurt to chip in and be a team player. But, if someone says no, don't pressure them into letting you help. They might be working on a confidential project or want the extra time at the office.

- If you office is going for a group outing post work unless you are ill or out of the office - you MUST go. It can be a great thing for your career. Though keep in mind, these are coworkers, not your best friends. Keep it appropriate.

- Last, whatever you do, don't cut anyone off in the parking lot. Not cool.

To review: keep it PC, be conscientious to your coworkers, and for the love of all things holy, DON'T whistle. 

Ditch the Phone

Most Sundays, I try to enjoy brunch with my parents. It's a relaxing way to catch up with my family and review all of our weeks, all while staying guilt free that I haven't seen them or spoken with them in weeks (because you know that happens). This week, the weather was lovely, so after brunch we chatted on their porch, enjoying the 70 degree weather and dappled sunlight.

It was ideal and charming. Families were playing catch in their perfect green lawns. People were gardening in their perfect flower beds. Families were riding bikes. Seriously. Their neighborhood is ridiculous.

Anyway, these charming families were walking dogs and their kids in strollers, when this lovely family rides their bikes by; Dad on a sporty bike, two little girls on a tiny white wheels bikes, a sullen teenager on a cruiser with a basket, and bringing up the rear, your classic "do-it-all" modern mom.

It was so perfect... except the mother was on her mobile phone. On her bike. Ignoring her family. Talking so loudly that from my parents' porch, I could hear the whole conversation.

I get the desire to be someone who does it all. Someone who can have a job, have kids, run a house, make delicious food, have a social life, do every Pinterest craft, and look flawless doing it all. It's unrealistic, but I get the desire.

But really, Lady. Engage with your family. Put your damn phone down and spend this gorgeous Sunday with your family. There is really no phone call that can't be taken in 20 minutes when you get back from your bike ride. As a kid, there was nothing more important than spending time with my family. Could you imagine spending this time with your parents and getting the "one minute" finger? You only have to get that one minute suggestion a few times until you stop trying. As an adult, I know I get frustrated when someone I have some important matter and they won't put down their phone.

Embrace your family. Engage your friends. Don't waste your life having superficial relationships, because you couldn't put your phone down and ask your family and friends about their day. 

Hey! I was watching that!

After five years of living alone in my little nugget house, I got a roommate. The Viking and his pup, Mocha, moved in at the end of this past summer. Needless to say things have been a little bit different around here. I have a new couch (and the current desire to rearrange my living room), less space in my closet, and a kitchen full of awesome gadgets! I've gained the best person to spend my free time with and someone to share everything with. Which includes my DVR. Dum dum DUUUUUUUMMMMM!

It's really not that bad, until we get to Tuesday nights and I want to record my shows and he wants his... and it only records two shows at one time. Gah!

As a little side note, let me just say, I have pretty awful taste in television. Not that amazing television is really happening currently in the world, but I have a talent to hunt out the Honey Boo Boos, Gypsy Weddings, Unfunny two camera comedies with laugh tracks... anything to not watch anything too scary (read: NCIS, Law & Order, CSI: Omaha, Or any of those crap dramas) I've lived by myself forever, so that was my excuse. Honestly though, I have a crazy imagination and a job where I have to review bomb threats and what to do in a hostage situation. Needless to say, I prefer rainbow, unicorns, and mildly funny comedies to get away from the stress of my day. Thankfully Sir Viking gets that and prefers reality shows that mostly involve restoration or digging things out of the dirt.

Since we both have things we want to watch, that are both pretty different, we've got a system down. (With the mildly reluctant help of Mocha and Lewie).

- Get a second DVR - After a mishap with some saved programs and trying to watch EVERYTHING on the Olympics, we opted to get an additional DVR for our bedroom. Mostly movies, jointly enjoyed shows (Daily Show, SNL, Real Time, etc.) and a few of his favorites have migrated upstairs as well, since he keeps later hours than I do.

- Take Turns - We watch the most TV together on weekend mornings eating breakfast. Our method: if you just watched one of your shows, let your roommate/significant other/cat watch one of their shows.

- Utilize On Demand - Sometimes you want to watch a couple of shows that are all on at the same time. Thankfully our cable service offers most of the popular TV shows the next day for free. So, naturally, we've been taking advantage of that.

- Consider Netflix, Hulu, or the like - For catching up on shows you like and making sure you have free space on your DVR.

Really, the most important thing is compromise. If you are choosing to live with someone, then you obviously like them. If you like them, you should probably be nice to the. And if they watch TERRIBLE TV and it's their turn, either grin and bear it, distract yourself, or politely go into a different room.






* No pups or kittens were harmed in the making of this blog... even if they look surprised that they were caught because they were up to no good (he is a cat, after all) or upset that they were awoken. 

Tiers of Friendship

So, who watches The Mindy Project? I happily fall into that category. But like every other show, I get into it and then watch it for a few weeks and then don't go near it for another month (I get distracted). But this past week Ms. Kaling brought up an interesting point:

Best Friend is not a person, it's a tier.

Acquaintances, Friends, Good Friends, Best Friends... Or maybe if you are a little bit younger/cooler than me it's like Randos, Your Posse, Homeslices, Best Bitches. (I don't know, kids these days...)

Okay, okay, hold on. If you are someone who has only one best friend and you have been best friends since you were five and you've never had another best friend, let me just say, you are incredibly lucky (or possibly delusional). Seriously though, if you are one of those rare few, that's really fantastic. The rest of us... not so much.

I think from time to time we have all felt the pressure that we need to have one best friend. It's like this golden status of superiority... that, frankly, I think is bullshit. 

Realistically, through out your life, you've probably moved when you were a kid or in high school, probably went away to college (or if you didn't go too far, I'm guessing a majority of your high school friends moved away), and then moved after college (and maybe a few times after that). This isn't even taking into account hobbies you've found along the way, significant others, maybe you got married, or even have a kid or two. I'm guessing, unless you hate people you probably made friends during these phases. Moreover, I'm going to assume that a few people became the proverbial "cream of the crop".

There is rarely just one that stands out above the rest. And that's because there are so many people with incredible qualities that bring so much to your life. That's really the best part. I may not be one of those girls with a BEST FRIEND, but I have a group of best friends who make my life better everyday. Best friends are like cookies. It's always a good idea to have more than one.

It's Been a While

So. It's January. I caught that too. Hrm. Sorry about that. I got a little busy living my life, rather than writing about how to make things easier/better/prettier/whatever. My writing team now includes two little boys named Mocha and Lewis... Who happen to be a dachshund and a tiger stripped teenage kitty, respectively. Oh yes. And a Viking.

From a life of a single, mildly care free (I can pretend), pet free gal to a pet crazed, official girlfriend of a live in Viking can get pretty hectic (though I really can't imagine how moms with like 87 kids do it), I'm having a ball.

So, yeah, it's been a while. In the honeymoon haze of my life for the past months, I feel like I've lost touch with some of my very best friends. Some is probably a natural growing apart, as life takes us in unexpected or at least different directions. Kids, pets, new jobs, boyfriends, girlfriends, moving, husbands, wives, life changes - it happens. For me, it is really important to continue these friendships as much as possible. Whether I haven't seen you in 5 years or 5 days, I am always happy to chat with an old friend. So, with a grand gesture - here is my old friend and yours, "the handy tips".

- Send a card! Mailing anything is so rare these days that it's a pretty special occasion when you get something in the mail. Even if it's a little note saying "I miss you."
- Visit them at work. If your friend works in an environment where visitors are okay, stop in! Just make sure to not stay too long, incase they have a tough boss.
- The phone works both ways. Instead of waiting on your friend to call you, call them. Or even send a text message if that's easier.
- Visit!! Some of my very best friends live thousands of miles away. I'm always happy to hop on a plane and go for a long weekend. Even if it's just to the other side of the state, a weekend together will always be fun and appreciated.
- Most importantly, make plans and keep them!!! Rather than saying let's get together and never seeing each other, pull up your calendar and see what works.

These seem obvious, right? Reconnecting with old friends... The hardest part is the first step. It's always a little weird at first, but I promise, they'll be happy you did. And so will you. Now... Who wants a weekend visitor???

Righty Runny, Lefty Lumpy

Some of you know what I'm getting into... And some of you don't. That's just fine because this a handy tip, just for you. 

When you're at restaurant and your table feels small and very crowded, and for some reason you can't figure out which water glass is yours or where your plate needs to sit, there is an easy solution. Thanks to one of my charming college roommates, I learned the easiest way to remember the solution to this predicament. Righty runny, lefty lumpy. Your drinks go on your right and your bread plate goes on your left. 

Easy as that. As long as everyone in your party remembers, there will be room for every plate on even the smallest tables!

High School Is Over.

A few weeks ago, while ignoring my DVR and trolling the interwebz (you know you do it too) I stumbled across a picture of a bunch of women, in what looked to be a glamor shot of sorts. The caption read "my friends are prettier than your friends".

Wow.

Okay, I will admit, your friends are all extremely pretty and the picture taken was lovely. I could only hope to take a picture near that nice (but alas, photogenic was not one of the traits I was awarded when they were being handed out.)

The caption is what got me. First, if you want to convey the message that your friends are beautiful, say that. There is no need to make someone feel bad to make yourself feel better. Second, however proud you are of your friends and how they may look, a little humility will win you a lot more points in the long run. Third, I'm fairly certain life isn't one big popularity contest, showing accolades in your yearbook. If that's what it's about, I suggest you take a wee moment for self reflection.

Your friends should be thought of as beautiful because of the people they are (Granted the more you know someone, the more good you see in them, the more beautiful they become to you). Kind, giving, caring, selfless... The kind of beauty that shines through even the darkest of days.

When you have appreciation for your life and can see the true beauty, you don't have to brag about how "pretty" your friends are, what a great car you have, how much money you make, etc. Your insecurity is showing, and it's not winning gaining you any points.

Good Etiquette

Etiquette is about making other people comfortable. It's not about you being prim and proper... But in a way it is, if being proper makes others comfortable, then, quite obviously that would be good etiquette.

Take a moment for reflection, what can you do to make someone's day a little easier? How can you make help have an easier day? ... That is true etiquette.

Lady Laws

Bro code, man cards... I get it. Be good to your fellow man, etc etc. I think it's high time we discuss the rules of being a girlfriend. They say men are competitive with sports... Women are competitive with EVERYTHING else. Who has the cutest shoes, who is dating the best guy, whose job is better, who gave to what charity. The list goes on and on. Some are material things and some are internal, all are judged.

Here's the thing, you can get so wrapped up in it, it can make your head spin or you can just refuse the game. I'm a proponent for doing what makes you happy. If you love your three year old shoes, wear them. If you want to give 5% of your salary to planned parenthood, I'm pleased to know you. Any way you look at it, girls need to stick together - especially you good girlfriends.

Here, by no means complete, are some of the most important Lady Laws.

In regards to style, you must:

- Notice different hair styles/colors.

- Compliment something if you legitimately like it.

- Tell someone if she has spinach in her teeth.

- Not copy everything a girlfriend wears, even if you love her style.

- Tell your girlfriend if an event/party you are going to has a specific dress code.

- Be honest when shopping together.

- Loan hair elastics and bobby pins if you have them to spare.

In regards to life decisions, you must:

- Not judge if called for a ride to or from somewhere.

- Keep your mouth shut if you don't like someone's significant other, unless asked.

- Open your mouth immediately if you think someone is making the wrong life long decision.

- Not "kill the messenger" if a girlfriend is honest with you.

- Be supportive in every way you can.

In regards to relationships, you must:

- Not disappear when you date a new person.

- Be accepting of the friend that disappeared when dating someone new.

- Make an effort to involve single and coupled friends.

- Understand that sometimes relationship/family activities have to take precedent. 

 

In regards to heartache, you must:

- Be supportive through heartache - involving, but not limited to, ice cream, wine, and lots of chocolate.

- Understand that sometimes a 2am phone call needs to happen.

- Tell your girlfriend when her self pity has started to effect her other relationships.

- Tell her when you ran into an Ex.

In regards to ex partners, you must:

- Tell her when you ran into an Ex.

- You must curse Ex's name if she needs to hear it.

- Under no circumstances, have relations of a sexual nature with an Ex, unless it was an insignificant relationship, a number of years (5 +), AND you have gained honest approval. And understand other girlfriends still reserve the right to place judgement. Basically, don't do it. 

It basically comes down to being a good person to one another... and going to the bathroom together in groups. Obviously.

How To: Be a Good House Guest

After years of threatening and planning (not even joking, it's been since 2006), I finally made it up to the Windy City to visit my college roommates (who accidentally on purpose live 1 1/2 blocks from each other). We couldn't decide where I would stay, so we decided one night at one house, one night at the other - so I got a double dose of air mattress surfing & they got to deal with my incessantly chipper morning chatter. Everyone involved way terribly pleased - and by everyone, I mean my roommates and I. Their significant others... that remains to be seen.

Since summer is coming up, that means there will be a lot of vacations coming up - which means a lot of couch surfing with inevitably happen. Here, as always, are a few handy tips to make the whole experience easier for everyone.

- First thing's first: ask before you come to stay with someone. Even if it's totally cool with you to have every Joe on the street to stay with you, never assume. If you are bringing your significant other, it's imperative that you check with all parties involved. Alternatively, if someone asks to stay at your home, and it is truly inconvenient, say no!
- Discuss you trip expectations before hand. Are you expecting someone to play host for you or do you like to check things out on your own? Maybe you're there for work & they have tons of school.
- If you're a planner, make sure everyone is involved in the decision making for your daily activities. Don't do just what you want to do.
- When eating in, make sure your host is aware of any allergies. It's rather uncomfortable for all involved when they only snacks available are all nut-tastic and you become hive child, just looking at them (no, my allergies are not THAT bad, settle down).
- When picking dinner options, make sure you have a few choices with a broad menu and a variety of prices. You might want to eat at every Top Chef restaurant you can find in that city, and your friends might be in money saving mode.
- If you're having a night out, try to take everyone's temperature involved. You may way to be out until 5am, and they may not. You can always find a happy medium.
- Discuss plans for the following day, the night before. That way everyone has similar expectations to how the day will go - even if it doesn't totally go as planned.
- When waking up in the morning, unless you know your host sleeps in late, try to wake up at a reasonable time. Nothing is more uncomfortable for someone who is trying to play host to you and you keep awkwardly sleeping. Alternatively, if you are an early riser like me, try to be quite and start your morning. Take a shower, make coffee, and quietly entertain yourself. That way when your host wake up, they won't feel bad about having slept in.
- When it's the last day of your stay, clean up. Strip the sheets from the bed, deflate mattresses, refold couches, and pack your stuff up. No one likes a hurricane for a house guest.
- Consider an email, thank you note, flowers, or whatever is your style to show your gratitude. A written thought to show appreciation can really go a long way.

Not that we don't adore our friends and family, and cherish the time we get to spend with them, but as they say, house guests and Fish have a lot in common, after three days - they stink! Keep it short and sweet and you'll be sure to get an invite back.

Water

For anyone that knows me, they know I drink a lot of water. All the time. And there is a reason for it: I feel better when I do.

When I was little, I wasn't a fan of overly sugary or tart juices (which eliminates ALL of them), my mother wouldn't let me have caffeine (shocking, right?) and my parents found out I was slightly allergic to milk (based on all my other allergies, it's not very shocking), so I got to drink a lot of water.

Well, I very quickly came to love the pure, cooling taste of a glass of water. I don't care if it's room temperature, chilled in the fridge, or even a little warm from the sun. I feel amazing after I drink it.

Funny enough, I actually notice the benefits of my excessive water drinking when I don't drink enough. I get a headache, my skin feels tight, my lips feel chapped and I feel bloated. Those symptoms are all pretty high on the horrific scale for me, so, I drink water.

If you drink as much water as I do, I implore you to get reusable glass/cup/container. If you're being good to yourself, you should also be good to the environment.

Don't Be That Guy... On a Plane

Thanks to the past long weekend, my travel bug was indulged - sort of. I, at least, got to fly around the country and spread my asinine musings and disdainful glances. (Though I promise, I'm super fun to travel with - you may have guessed, I'm a little judgy).

Here are a few things I've been reminded of while traveling this weekend that I now feel obliged to share with you.

Packing:
- Leave your big items (shoes, bags, accessories) at home. You'll inevitably buy something and then you won't. have room to pack at the end of the trip.
- I don't care if the weather calls for 9000 degrees or negative 45 degrees. Always pack at least one t-shirt, one light jacket of your choosing, and a pair of flip flops. You'll thank me later.
- If you're going with a group, plan ahead of time if someone is bring a blow dryer, straightener, or curling iron. No need to pack multiples.

At The Airport:
- Wear comfy clothes for the plane, if you can. I understand that sometimes we have to wear specific outfits one planes or something special for the second you get off the plane, but comfortable is always better.
- Please don't take comfort too far. I don't recommend wearing your pajamas or juicy sweatsuit (please. Tell me you don't own one) on a plane. You look silly.
- If you can, wear slip on shoes (and socks!?) for going through security.
- When riding an escalator or people mover, stand to the right, unless otherwise noted. There are people who have places to be - so stand to the side. Their lives will be easier if they don't have to dodge you. And you have the chance of not getting your toes run over.

On The Plane:
- Don't take up more than your space.
- If you smoke, try to grab some gym or wear an outfit that doesn't stink. It's a small enclosed space, please remember that.
- Bring some form of entertainment, it is not the responsibility of the person next to you to entertain you.
- If the person sitting next to you is reading to listening to headphones quit bugging them. Please. I beg you.
- If you get cold easily (like me!) try to bring a jacket or cardi with you on the plane.

When traveling, you'll find me in jeans (or denim cut non jeans) loafers or flats, a comfy top, and always my trusty scarf (you never know when you're going to need to cuddle with your blankie or cover your nose from a foul smell).

Good luck and bon voyage, my friends!!!

I Don't Usually Smell Like Fish

This phrase was uttered to me the other day. With a completely straight face and completely earnest.

"I don't usually smell like fish."

But really, to make matters worse, is wasn't just a fish smell. There was a bit of salty body odor, as well.

Clearly, my new friend had been spending the day fishing and had yet to make it home to bathe. I realize sometimes you are in a rush to go places and people have busy lives, but honestly, if you know you smell that bad, take a shower before you go out in public.

You can smell yourself. You understand what body odor smells like... if you have been doing something strenuous, you've been working with something odoriferous, or it's been a little bit of time, shower. Please, I beg of you.

Bathe and you won't have to awkwardly say to someone "I don't usually smell like fish."

Fun Date Ideas

Whether you just started dating or you've been married for years and years, date night is something I think is necessary to all relationships - and something I've seen my parents do almost weekly since I can remember. They're still together after 30+ years - so I'm fairly certain they are doing something right. It might not be ALL about date night, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it helps to take a little time to spend together - just the two of you. 

Dinner... movie... Blah Blah Blah. No thanks. Let's make it interesting. 

- Go to the local farmer's market together. You can buy each other thoughtful and yummy presents! You can pick up flowers, fresh veggies, and tons of other local goods. And don't even get me started on the people watching!
- Get active! Play mini golf, go bowling, go ice skating... something fun and exciting. It will get your blood pumping and whether you're terrible or the best ever, you'll be laughing the whole way. 
- Go to a local "point of interest". You may think these are just for tourists... but really, when was the last time you went to the local botanical garden? Never? It's a great place to explore and spend some time together. 
- Drive to the next town over and explore!
- Go to a grocery store that you don't normally visit, pick out food together and prepare a meal together at home.  
- Google: Local vineyards. Who doesn't love a wine tour? Bet you didn't know there are even a few near our tiny beach town. 
- A personal favorite of time... get friends together, everyone brings a dish and a bottle of wine. Eat, drink, and be merry. 
- A day at the beach or the park. Bring a blanket, lunch, some music, and a Frisbee. 
- Go to a theme park or the fair... Let your inner kid come out!
- Check out GroupOn or LivingSocial. They always have great activities you probably didn't know were even out there... and they are cheap! Kite Boarding? Beer School? It's all been available in the past week.
-  Take an art class together, painting, pottery, anything working with your hands. It will be fun and you'll have a little memento.

Don't be afraid to get creative. If you're an established couple, you might learn something new about your partner. If it's someone new, you'll learn very quickly what their comfort zone is and if it matches yours (or if it's something you want nothing to do with).

Quite Possibly The Most Annoying Word On The Planet

Déclassé

Ugh. It makes me dry heave just a little.

Déclassé means something that has a "fallen or reduced status". But when said with a pretentious accent (you know what I'm talking about!) it's about three million times worse. I may or may not have been watching an episode of Housewives from Godonlyknowswhere (how is this show STILL on TV? Props to Bravo for not giving up) and the women kept saying something was so "Déclassé". The issue was, only one of them actually said it with the correct accent... the rest of the women kept saying "it's SO de-clASSy". With the most bizarre nasally accent. Sorry ladies, but none of you are in the dirty Jerz, nor are you from there. You sound like trash.

Friends, let's put the proverbial kibosh on this word so it doesn't turn into a verbal epidemic amongst the Lady Cougars in our little town.

Well... Excuse You!

Last night, I was out with my usual group of food loving, cheese adoring, trouble making lady friends. For the dinner portion of our evening, we went to a great local restaurant that turns into the local cougar bar on some nights. It's great for people watching, the food is moan worthy, and champagne is $2 (hey ladies' night!) After we finished our meal, we made the inevitable transition to the house music thumping dance floor. This is where the trouble began.

As we sipped out drinks and wiggled to the music, people kept bumping into us. It was not crowded. We had a decent amount of space and people would dance into us or (my favorite) walk in between us. Obviously we realized we were more in the way than not, but every time someone walked in between out conversation or bumped into someone, nary a "excuse me", nor "pardon me" was given.

When did common niceties go away? I'm not okay with this. Truthfully, of I was between someone at the grocery store, I say excuse me. Because it's rude to be in someone's way - when they are talking to someone, looking at or for something, or just generally being in their own personal space.

Next time, take a moment and think to yourself, if it would bother you - it probably bothers someone else. So say excuse me. It covers a whole manner of sins and suddenly your politeness simmers down someone who otherwise might have been ready to snap.

Age Approproate, Part 2: Baby Prostitutes

Okay, I'll admit it, I don't totally get kids these days. 

And yes, I realize that statement alone makes me "out of touch" and roughly about 8,000 years old. But fine, whatever. That's just how it's going to be.

Over the weekend, I was at an event with a few girlfriends and we couldn't help but stare at a poor, misguided child wearing a Barbie pink Herve Leger style bondage dress.  With patent leather white platforms. She was... maybe, MAYBE 14. Did I forget to mention the frosted light pink. I guess I did. From reading by now, I'm sure you know the bigger the "O", the bigger the hoe. It was painful. And I promise I wasn't being a giant bully, nor was I the only one who was shocked. It was the WHOLE crowd. 

Then... I saw her mother. And I understand why she was dressed the way she was. Her mother was severely inappropriate, especially for a daytime, kid friendly event.

As I've said before, the way you look is the first thing people see, something they remember, and the thing they immediately judge you on. Regardless of if their opinion is correct, it happens. As your child's parent/mentor/guardian/protector/common sense, make sure they are giving off the right appearance, as well. 

It makes me wonder, when did it become okay for children to dress overly sexy? I mean, I realize that it happens all the time - just go to any shopping mall in America, or heck, any high school, or middle school for that matter. There will be things that shock and appall all of us. 

Here's my take on the whole thing: My children will look like children. Not mini hookers. They will not wear overly suggestive clothing, too baggy pants, lewd t-shirts, or giant hooker heels. Even if it seems like too big of a fight. But I also don't want them to look like the Brady Bunch or in odd, formal clothing. There are few things that make me more uncomfortable than a little boy at a wedding in shorts, a peter pan collar, and leather buckled t-straps at a wedding. Too formal. Too old fashioned. No thanks. 

Maybe it's because I'm not yet a parent - maybe I have the idea wrong. Though I'm fairly certain this is a battle I won't bend on. Let's make a pact right here, friends. Let's let our kids be kids. Let's allow them to express themselves with tutus, Mohawks, colorful band-aids, and t-shirts that say things like "I do all my own stunts!" I would much rather have the tween child wearing a Justin Beiber t-shirt, than a skin tight leopard print party dress. Wouldn't you? Normal children (regardless of however lame their current teen idol may be) are way better than baby prostitutes.

Nattily

Are you a Jeopardy! genius or an fervent researcher? Wait… you’re neither? So, the question is, do you know what Nattily means?

Natti·ly adv.

in a strikingly neat and trim manner

Neat, trim, and smart; dapper.
[Perhaps variant of obsolete netty, from net, elegant, from Middle English, from Old French; see neat1.]

So, now you know. It all kind of makes sense now, huh?

Change the World

They say the best etiquette is to make others feel comfortable. Selfless giving is something we can all do to help change the world.

Now, one of the best series I've read in years, the Hunger Games and the UN World Food Programme have joined forces. Check out this website and help change the world!!

Hunger Games & World Food Programme

Basically... be a badass like Katniss. 

Age Appropriate

Over the past few weeks, I've had multiple conversations with friends about women dressing their age. This seems to have become a bit of an issue for people. I for one, though in my late-ish 20s, have been known to wear cardigans and pearls, and I realize it can learn towards the dowdy side.

Alternatively, we live in a world where women of a certain age are rewarded for looking much younger than their actual age. Botox, augmentations, fillers, lypo. It can get extreme. If that's what you need to feel better about yourself, go for it. But really a healthy diet, some exercise, and really good moisturizer will make a HUGE difference.

As they say, 50 is the new 30. Wrong. 30 is still 30 and 50 is still 50. With that in mind, here are a few tips to think about, the next time you are shopping or getting dressed.

- If your clothes are in odd sizes (5,7,9) chances are the don't fit correctly. Why, you ask? Because clearly you purchased those in the junior's section. Juniors is for teenage girls - not adults. Sure the clothes may be cheaper, and we know how I love a good bargain. But really, the cut is completely wrong for any sort of curve and the quality is frightening. Seriously, you would have to purchase 3 pairs of pants in juniors to get the wear out of one pair of pants from an adult store. 

- Cover yourself. If you have lots of tattoos or lacy things, consider the environment you're in. I'm all for self expression - if you've got tattoos and love them, show them off. But obviously you're not going to show your whole sleeve while you're at work in your corporate office. Or say you've decided to wear your new lacy bra... I'm not entirely sure why you'd want to expose it - though I've seen it twice in the past month. Here's the best way to expose your lacy bra, and not look like trash. Wear a deep v sweater or cardigan and pants (please wear pants with this!) and let a tiny bit peak out. A little sexy, a little trashy. But if you're uncomfortable or if you're anything other than a 0, like the rest of us, you might want to consider buying a top with lace details and just giving a nod at the trend.

- If you're going to make a terrible fashion decision, like overalls (terribly unflattering to ALL body shapes), don't try to sexy it up.  Embrace your decision and wear some camo with it. Or better yet, burn, sell, or give away your overalls.

- A really good rule of thumb to work by, when getting dressed to go out, if you're going short on the bottom (and I implore you to consider what length of short is appropriate) cover up on top. If you are being a little revealing on top, cover more on the bottom, say... with pants. Novel, yes. It will also get you the type of attention you desire, rather than attention from bikers and creeper that wear Ed Hardy.

- What it comes to accessories, your mother was right, less is more. A few classy accessories will make any outfit, while piles of cheap mall accessories will make you look just that - cheap.

- If your dress is a tube dress, gold, skin tight, with cut outs - You look like a whore. I don't care if you are 15 or 50. This dress is entirely too over the top and has too many trashy elements going on. Even if it's a planned party where everyone is dressing like complete hookers - you don't HAVE to win this round, dignity will be better to have in the end.

The key to dressing your age is to embrace your body, no matter the size, accessorize with pieces you love, be proud to be you, and most importantly, when in doubt, cover up. Dressing age appropriately will make people take you more seriously and will ultimately help you out in life. Why not try it?